I was standing on the train platform today listening to some tunes and just generally chillin on the way home. I wasn’t rushing anywhere. I wasn’t trying to cram my time with reading or doing. I was just being and absorbing and… breathing. I realised that’s something that I’ve not done in a long time.
When I was growing up I used to allow myself a lot of time to just breathe. Hanging around with friends doing nothing. Skating, basketball, music – even when I was doing these things my pace was far less frantic. I don’t know when, but at some stage along the way I tripped into overload mode and I think I’m only now starting to rediscover what it means to give myself space to breathe. It’s a nice feeling – something I intend to keep doing.
It’s meant that I’ve not been able to do as much. But whereas I once thought that was a bad thing, I’m actually seeing it as a virtue. Blogging (both reading and writing) has been one of the activities I’ve been missing. I’m glad to be getting back into the swing of things and I expect that as I settle into my new position at WWF the flow will return.
I was saying to some friends on Sunday – I’m feeling really good at the moment. About life. About who I am. It may be a combination of the new job, relaxing a bit more, looking after myself better. Finding safety in friendships inside and outside the house.
I’m even starting to write happier songs. I didn’t think that was possible, but the new ideas that are coming up lately definitely have a lighter touch.
I don’t really have a point to this entry really, other than to say life is good and I’m happy! (Not something I’m known to do very often.)